How To Deal With Anger…And Not Throw Potatoes At Your Husband!

I once threw a potato at my husband! I was in the middle of peeling it. It was raw, it was hard, and it hit my husband on the head!

In the early years of marriage, there were several times when I flipped in anger. I slammed doors, threw things on the floor, and, yes, even threw a potato!

Those of you who know me will find this hard to believe, but it is true. Little things would build up inside me, until one last little thing triggered an explosion.

Anger is a horrible thing. It takes control. It reacts violently. It is frightening.

When that anger came over me, it wasn’t me. I truly believe it was a spirit of anger. (We can of course feel God’s righteous anger at injustice. That is a different thing.)

Where did that anger come from? Why did I react so explosively?

One Sunday at church, some time later, the pastor spoke about offences that had been committed against us in the past, and that God wanted to release us from the hurt and anger of those offenses.

I remembered an incident from years earlier when I had first felt that frightening anger come over me. That’s when anger had taken root in my heart. I forgave the offender, received prayer, and felt incredible release.

It was truly remarkable. The spirit of anger was gone. Praise God! That violent anger never again controlled me.

Yes, there have been times when I have felt angry since, but not the same frightening anger.

I have learnt to be quicker to forgive, and not let anger take root in my heart. I have also learned to communicate before things build up!

I share this story for two reasons:

First, we tend to think that the Christian women we know don’t shout at their kids, hit out or shake their child in anger, slam doors, or throw things at their husband.

But actually, I am sure that all of us have ‘lost it’ with our husband or kids at some point or another. I have done all of the above. I’m not proud of it, and I’ve had to say sorry, and ask for forgiveness. We can be honest about these things; we’ve all been there. We can ask for prayer, and ask for the Holy Spirit’s help.

Second, I’m sure there are many of you who struggle with anger as I did. You know that it is not really you, and you hate it, and would love to be free of it. You can be!

Ask God to show you the root of your anger, the event or offense that triggered those feelings – it may be from way back in your past. Share with someone you trust. Forgive and release the offender/s, and have someone pray with you.

God is faithful to help us, if we ask him!

What about my husband and the potato? Well, he was OK. Shocked, I guess! But he laughs about it now. Thankfully!

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Do you want to grow a heart of love for your husband?

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We talk about having a heart for the lost, and having a heart for our friends and neighbours. How about having a heart for your husband? A heart that begins to see him as God does, a heart that believes the best for him, a heart that gives everything for him.

Only God can give us this heart… through prayer.

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Prayer does not have to be difficult or boring. It can be life changing, exciting and wonderful – for you, and your husband!

And it may just help, too, if you are struggling with anger 🙂

Pray! Don’t throw potatoes!